Pirate vs Knight


The Knights’ armor is unbelievable, unless you use ancient heavy artillery or a modern gun. With only his joints and eyes as weakpoints, using melee weapons against him is suicide. Arrows and rocks bounce off of him instantly. If the armor didn’t slow him down and was bullet proof, the Knight would still exist today as the deadliest warrior (though warfare will start using rpg rockets instead of guns). European Knights themselves claim to be holy and honorable warriors, but the truth is most (not all, I said MOST) examples of Knights and wars of Knights have them more of brutes and thuggish noblemen killing or ruling over their presents. Their ‘holyness’ is just an excuse to invade other nations but they can take Christianity a little too far at times, to the point where they would probably support a genocide against Muslims. I guess that’s why NATO is European, HA.

Broadsword This is a large and heavy one handed sword, able to cut a human in half and stab through them. Although a little too heavy for a duel with a smaller sword, it does have quite a range on it too. It can keep the opponent back easily. It is able to maneuver by pulling or pushing the tip of the blade. Compared to other swords, it’s definitely high quality and its popularity and historic effectiveness shows it.

Halberd This weapon apparently changed the face of battle. Halberd became the dominant spear of Europe until the end of melee fighting. With stabling and hacking, it can kill at any distance in any way. The most optional two handed spear yet.

Morning Star This club does its damage, an instant kill on a direct hit almost every time. However, it’s hard to control. Spinning it around hoping to land a hit, it looks easy to dodge and it’s preparing time makes it visible and slow to strike. It’s so easier to use a stiff club than a chained one.

Crossbow The Knight Crossbow appears to have no abnormal properties and loads as quick as a bow and arrow. It appears to be the default crossbow, not too slow but still accurate. The only reason to use a fast loading crossbow over a bow and arrow is because you have no skill in bows and need a gun-like weapon to hit anything.

Armor- NO, IT’S NOT A WEAPON. Steel plate, as I see, has no weaknesses except those exposed joints in the armor. But most weapons cannot go through plate armor; stab, club, or slash. You can take any hit if the hit is inaccurate. Knights have abnormally heavy armor at 70lb, the heaviest yet- I think… yeah, I’m pretty confident. If I’m a heavy and slow warrior, I want steel plate. Oh, combine that with a shield and you are untouchable.


As an ancient warrior, the pirate can kill any armored foe with his hard hitting gunpowder weapons. The lighter foes might do more damage to the pirate due to their faster attacks and dodging, so the Ninja has a better chance right? To the oldschool gun wielders, the pirate is too close range for a gunfight. If it was on a boat, the pirate will have an advantage, but everywhere else his short-range weapons will be a big handicap.

Cutlass Because pirates fought on ships, they needed a small sword that can deliver damage. The cutlass was perfect for the job. It was short, fast, one handed, could stab and can cut a man in half. However, off the boat, this sword’s shortness can make it’s user vulnerable against longer swords.

Boarding Axe This axe is not fragile at all, but it is extremely short. If it is used 2-handed style, it will only work on a defenseless opponent. It is easy to avoid or block this weapon. It’s just SO TINY.

Flintlock Pistol Pirates normally carried multiple pistols into battle due to their 1 shot rounds (makes sense, I know I would have). Using pre-loaded guns gives a faster rate of fire than most ancient warriors but is no match for a normal pistol nowadays (duh). The flintlock loses accuracy at just 10ft, unable to hit precisely at any range. The worst trait is the inability to penetrate heavy plate armor, so you need to be point blank to score at the neck or eyes, if you’re lucky enough!

Blunderbuss This gun proved that guns destroyed the warriors of the past, this shotgun will instantly kill any armored ancient warrior. However, the weapon has a chance of failing shown in the show, so that’s why some pirates carried 2 or maybe even more. If I had to fight a Spartan or a Knight, I would never want to melee fight him, so shotgun all the way!

Grenado ~3ft r The grenade shows a devastating shrapnel blast looking like a cheese grater. But annoying douchebag says “The grenade didn’t pierce the armor, it shouldn’t have gotten that many kills”. Here’s the thing people, Knights are NOT 100% ARMORED. They have open gaps in their joints, neck, eyeholes, ect. A grenade could do serious damage at those areas, which it does because shrapnel flies EVERYWHERE. Also, the impact of the blast would definitely knock you down, maybe even kill a Knight if thrown at his face.

Terrain- Boats and Coastlines- Pirates mastered close range gunfighting with their ambushing raids, but they were better on boats. On boats, the lack of room made close range pistols, grenades and shotguns devastating. This is why Pirates didn’t use muskets that much.


This match proved why the imperfect black powdered weapons eliminated the classical melee warrior. These multiple light one shot weapons of the Pirate can pierce or go around the Knight’s slow heavy armor. The Knight’s melee weapons had similar kills between each other because if the Pirate’s weapons didn’t work, the Knight would easily kill him with these melee weapons. Without the ability to overcome the Knight’s armor, the Knight would win like 10-1 (that’s just an estimate). Despite being less reliable, guns proved to be more lethal than the bow and arrows they outclassed. If you can just shoot the armored guy charging at you, he dies and you win. Don’t even have to swordfight.

Oh, and you HATERS will be HATING when I explain why the Pirate survived the Morning Star in the simulation. The Morning Star has spikes on it, and the first swing only cut the Pirate. You can clearly see his cheek lacerated from the injury, it didn’t hit him directly. The next swing didn’t have much of a windup, which is needed to make the morning star more lethal- AND it only hit the pirate in the shoulder- again not a lethal injury even though it must hurt like a MOTHER. The Morning Star is extremely unwieldy and inaccurate, which explains the relatively lower kill count.

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